Wednesday, 27 July 2016
SEEMINGLY MEANINGLESS DATES
Do you have grapes? No? Then how about a date? Just a brief pick-up line to start off with this topic. I’m sure all of us, at some point of our encounters with the people around us, have gone through dates with a person who catches our attention and whom we would like to have an interest in. Some people might think it’s really pointless to go on dates because sometimes it doesn’t amount to anything in the end and the effort that they put in to it is just a waste of energy and time.
Now, considering the fact that not all of us are the same, dating a person practically means consistency to me. If you were to multitask your way through a number of guys and girls without really getting to know them really well, then it’s really pointless. Therefore, I don’t think dates are meaningless due to the fact that it is important for you to get to know a specific person personally. I mean if you’re just dating for marriage, or till marriage, but not knowing who he or she really is like on the inside and it ends up in a divorce, it’s better not to have a marriage at all to begin with.
As such, I’d like to draw your attention to what I think dating should be. There’s no right or wrong to it and this is based off my honest opinion. Dates, in general, are of course moments where you’d bring a guy or a girl out where the two of you can have decent conversations about yourselves or even ask about one's life conditions. Getting to know each others background, family, likes, dislikes, etc. are of course some of the obvious thing you’d both talk about. There will definitely be similarities and differences between the both of you. However, a person once told me this, “Oil and water can never mix together, but if the both of these can come to an understanding of what they truly are, then it’s not impossible for those two to be together even if they aren’t able to mix”.
Certain things could also be a halting factor to your dates such as it being one sided, age gaps, religion, etc. Feelings could slowly be build up or crumble down easily when you get yourself in to this. That being said, if two people have genuine feelings for each other, even if certain circumstances do not allow those two to be together (Long distance relationships, etc.), it boils down to the fact that whether each of them is able compromise or to comply to the difficult situation they’re in if they truly want to make things happen.
For me, at times, I do think it’s pointless or meaningless to date. If not all of us, at least some, have gone through and faced really bad breakups after we’ve build something through the dates that we’ve done because we were all once young and naïve. Its like we can't help but to find ourselves falling in love with someone after taking an interest in them. Some dates are never fun and games at times. Some people try others like they’re trying on shoes, a “try and throw” thing. Learning from this is part and parcel of life so we take what we have and use it for what we will have. Even if things don’t work out between you and your so called partner who might be indecisive as to whether or not he or she should begin a relationship with you, spending time alone with the person is good enough because it’s not every day you get to hangout personally with someone right?
If you’re the type who takes things more seriously, take it slow and don’t rush into it. Feelings are meant to be constructed and built together with whoever it is you want to be with, and not instantly forcing them into a relationship just because you want to be certain that they’ll stay. In some aspects, as I’ve mentioned earlier, it would seem like a waste of time and it amounts to nothing in the end. Bear in mind that not every relationship would be a successful one, but at the very least, it helps to build us in some way. I can’t exactly say in what way because it’s different for everyone. So never give up on love, be who you are, love as much as you’re loved and be happy.