ME AGAINST MYSELF

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      Have you ever come across a time where you had to confront yourself face to face until it led to an internal conflict? I know I have. Denying who we really are and accepting what we’re not is not something unusual; in fact, who we are depends on the type of people we usually commune or mix around with. 

   Chimeric personalities, if I may put it, are usually present when we’re with different people, almost like a chameleon. Is this healthy you may ask? To be honest, I’m not completely sure myself. I’ve been mixing with various types of people, and sometimes, being influenced by certain acts, slangs or gestures tend to be imminent. When I’m with people whom I’m comfortable around with, I’d be a whole new person. Note that some people even change themselves entirely just to have someone accept them as a friend, which in my point of view is not a good thing. Never trade who you are to be someone you’re not.

      Having various personalities doesn’t necessarily mean that you’ll end up having an internal strife with your other self. It usually involves these 3 parts, who you are, who you're not, and who you want to be. Some embrace every side there is to them, others might face a disorder when it comes to certain situations in their life. Emotions play an important role in deciding this. Sometimes, we give control to the side of us others don’t want to see and blame that side of ours when it is truly who we are. It’s not a separate entity. If you’re familiar with a villain named Two-Face from Batman, you’ll know what I’m trying to confer. 

     I was mixing around a few Americans at one point of my life and strangely enough, I found myself speaking in a different way. Sometimes taking a different language may also change the way we portray ourselves to others when we use it. This could be a good thing if we know how to control it and we should put a leash on whatever personality that we wouldn’t want to be on the loose. Personalities that get out of hand are bad news, especially when you’re in a situation where it aggravates or encourages that personality to surface.

      Ever heard of the term Dissociative Identity disorder (DID)? Well you have now if you haven’t heard of it before. This is a disorder where one believes that he or she has one or more personalities and even talks to these within him or herself. There’s nothing wrong with talking to yourself, or a different self, but it’ll seem a little strange if the decisions that you make are based on self-created persona. Your desires aren’t yours but at the same time it is. It’s not worth struggling against yourself when you’re just you, not anybody else.

     So beware when you’re creating a different personality aside from who you truly are. Be yourself, because you’re you, being unique and special in every way and there’s no one else who’ll be the same as you. Accept who you are and never blame others for who you are, even if they made you that way. We all have a choice to turn that around, don’t we? If the heart desires, so can the mind, as well as your actions.

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